After being kicked out of my ex’s apartment I had to move back in with my old man. You’d think after beating prostate cancer last December he’d be grateful to have me back. But no. He says I need to pay rent if I want to stay in my old childhood room.

After being kicked out of my ex’s apartment I had to move back in with my old man. You’d think after beating prostate cancer last December he’d be grateful to have me back. But no. He says I need to pay rent if I want to stay in my old childhood room.

Riblet said she wanted to go to the Burnville Music Festival for our anniversary, but rapper Triple S.E.X. poured malt liquor all over his onstage equipment and started an electrical fire, which destroyed all of Burnville and two state parks, along with the extinction of a dozen different species of birds.

As their Educational Liaison, I lead them past the turnstiles and into the park. I show them Hooverville. It’s a row of decrepit shacks with bums sleeping outside of them.

Had a great time going back home for Thanksgiving. Everyone was there—Mom, Dad, my Sister, our championship horse Spencer.

Hello and welcome to Royce’s Corner. This is the only place where we dare to discuss the hard topics, like “why making white children learn Spanish is racist.”